When Your Kids Drive You Up The Walls

Parenthood has a way of bringing the best and the worst out of you.

It is a journey much like a roller coaster ride… you can go up and down, sometimes without warning. And it is definitely not for the faint-hearted!

Having been in this ride for close to 11 years, I have had my fair share of triumph and failures, joy and tears.

At times when the kids act up, I morphed into this ugly monster, one that I did not know existed within me.

And when the wrath has passed, what’s left is usually a dark cloud of sadness and guilt.

“Don’t you realise the power of your words on your kids?”
“Why did I lose my cool with the kids?”
“Why couldn’t I stay calm and smile in the midst of their tantrums and ridiculous behaviours?”
“Why am I not a better mother?”

Why why why… and the tears flow. The heart is heavy. The willpower and resolve to be the best mom ever vanished into thin air.

Is it only me or have you experienced the same?

Don’t get me wrong. I love my kids and have never regretted becoming a mother. If I were to live my life all over again, I would still choose to be a mother. I am also clearly aware that motherhood is a privilege and there are some who yearns to be one but it remains an unfulfilled desire.

So I am grateful to have three lovely children. Grateful to be on this journey.

It is only during those times when I’m being driven up the walls or when I lose it, that I feel totally defeated.

And I wish I am a better mom. A more patient one. A more loving one.

When my head hits the pillow at night, I pray for one thing: That my kids will turn out fine despite all my parental shortcomings.

And when I awake the next morning, I try again, to be a better mom.



One thought on “When Your Kids Drive You Up The Walls

  1. Yes, I experienced the same thing. Parenting is a daily process and it’s not easy that easy. The only thing that I’m proud and sure of is that we became better parents after experiencing the rain and more stronger than before. We should keep on moving, mom! 🙂


Your Thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s